Positive Discipline Parenting

Positive discipline encourages good behavior and finds positive ways to deal with misbehavior. All children make mistakes. There is no such thing as a perfect child, or a perfect parent for that matter.

The first step to positive discipline is to develop a close a trusting relationship with your child. Spend some time each day playing with your child, doing the things they want to do, such as going to the park or playground.

It is easy to notice bad behavior. The trick is to notice and compliment good behavior. When your child has done something good, praise them for it. The key is to pay attention to them, otherwise, you may not notice. Try to be specific in your compliments and detail what they did well or right.

Avoid using negative words when telling the child what you want. Instead of saying “don’t yell,” say “please use your inside voice.” Using positive phrases will help the child understand what you are looking for, and will also prevent them from feeling controlled.

Using reward to encourage positive behavior can be a very effective parenting tool. Remember that children may not be able to see long term goals yet. Telling them they will be rewarded at the end of a school year may seem like an eternity and they will have difficulty remembering what they are supposed to do. Instead, find things to reward them for on a weekly basis, or perhaps even daily basis.

In order to avoid misbehavior it’s important to develop set routines. Make sure dinner time and bedtime are at the same time of day each day. Have them do their homework as soon as they get home from school. It may take awhile, but once the routine is set in the child’s mind, they will usually adhere to it without questioning it.

Discourage misbehavior by ignoring it. A child will often misbehave just to get attention. By acknowledging a bad attitude you are giving in to their bad behavior and encouraging them to continue this type of behavior for attention.

Give your child a choice with a specific consequence. Tell them that if they do not eat their greens, they cannot watch TV after dinner, and the choice is theirs. It is important to enforce any rules and consequences; otherwise the child will learn to call your bluff.

The most important aspect of positive discipline is remaining calm. When you lose your temper you will often do or say things you do not mean. This can confuse or scare the child. Remain positive throughout any arguments to help lead your child by example. They look up to you and any negative traits you display, they may copy.

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